Bucket list, Bantureeti kolu and Blogging

Covid 19 has done the impossible – bringing me back from a self imposed hiatus and type out these letters on a laptop (in 2020, this is a big deal). The initial 3 week lockdown brought out the child in me.

WFH = summer vacation = taking it easy = unadulterated fun!

The last time I had a 3 month vacation was in high school. On the last day of school, I would jot down the “fun things” I would do in my vacation which included stuff like

a) “Practice” music everyday. – I actually sang Bantureeti kolu at 5 1/2 kattai shruthi on my cobweb ridden shruthi box the first day.

b) Learn French from some old, moth eaten books that my aunt owned. – The only French words I learnt were “La salle de classe” but more on that another time

c) Learn cooking which meant learn how to make palak paneer and malai kofta and not the humble rasam that I gobble up day in and day out these days

d) Play tennis using a badminton racquet that I got “free”, the one and only time I bought Milo. Sorry folks, you are looking at a Bournvita loyalist!

e) Diligently learn *cough* Calculus & Trigonometry *cough* from my Thatha, a retired Math teacher.

f) Read books by John Grisham, Ayn Rand, Jeffrey Archer and all those fancy authors that everyone just seemed to be talking about. – I ended up re-reading Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban for the 57th time along with Gokulam (does anyone remember the Undir family?)

Obviously, I did none of the above including (e) which was a last minute addition to the list by the mother. All I did was while away time until the cousins arrived and then it was 10 hours of playing in the sand, feeding leaves to stray goats and frightening kittens. Now, Modi ji gave me the perfect opportunity to do justice to the above discarded list and I decided to add a few more items to the list like

(a) “Convincing” the H to “allow” me to avail the one month free subscription that Netflix offers.

(b) Try baking because clearly sourdough bread and garden foccacia are the palak paneer and malai kofta of 2020.

(c) Watching Breaking Bad, Money Heist and the Netflix series that has cute guy Oberyn Martell in it.

(d) Learn machine learning, deep learning and GAN because I have all the time in the world and can become an expert in emerging technologies.

So this time, I knew I was going to do everything as planned because two decades is a long time and is expected to bring about a semblance of traits like maturity, patience and all those complex words that mean the same. So what happened? I watched half a movie on Prime – Vijay na’s masala blockbuster Theri, 30 mins of the 1st episode of Breaking Bad, read the title card of Money Heist and typed out “Narcos” and hit the ‘Search’ button on the Netflix app.

On the cooking front, I went as far as buying a packet of baking soda and baking powder. That’s when I realized that there are more vital needs like rasam and sambhar powder and idli batter. I also bought vinegar and soy sauce and two packets of hakka noodles that are sitting on the shelf and will continue to do so until their expiry date. Needless to say, I signed up for an ML course but have clearly been “too busy” to continue learning.

Which brings me to the realization that I am the female equivalent of George Constanza from Seinfeld. I can sit at home all day, do absolutely nothing and still go to bed promptly at 10 pm out of sheer exhaustion. I’ve spent 3 months doing this. I can do this till the end of the year, probably longer and also whine about “going back to work” once the lockdown is over. For years, I thought that I have to find my passion in life, chase it, and strive towards doing fulfilling it. The lockdown and George Constanza have helped me realize that “doing nothing” is my passion and I’m already living the life.

Garden foccacia!! *bursts into laughter*

P.S: Today I found a colony of ants in my balcony and they seemed to be working in tandem, probably looking for some food without so much as a grumble. Now, did that inspire me? In a way, yes! I sprinkled a teaspoon of sugar around them so that they didn’t have to work too hard to find a bite to eat. Well I hope they learn to work a little less hard.

The Importance of being a programmer

 

 

Apparently anyone can become an engineer today. And there are two ways to do this. One, enroll your kid in one of those TIME or LIME institutes in the 7th standard, spoil his adolescent life and sincerely hope that he will land up in IIT ( That too, only IIT Madras, Powai or Delhi. Not their inferior stepsisters a.k.a Roorkee,Indore etc..). Two, dump him in any engineering college outside the city and also keep a pack of glucose ready to combat the enormous energy drain. And at the end of 4 years, voila! An Engineer is born.

And if you thought that your problems end here, let me reassure you, they don’t!!!

Strangely, the Indian software community is unanimously divided into 2 categories – the “software developer” and um…you know, the rest of the people who are present in your workplace (i.e testers, configuration engineers, office boys). So basically if you are not a “programmer”, you are a nobody. You are secretly frowned upon by the programmers. In spite of the fact that you are an expert in your chosen area, you are never taken seriously. A configuration engineer? Ah, you merely check in and check out files. Writing expert? you write stories in Microsoft word! Call center employee?  Oops!! You are nothing more that a guy with a headphones explaining why Tata Sky is not responsible if your maid didn’t turn up.  And in case you are a hardware expert, I really pity you! The image of a mechanic clad in dirty clothes digging his spanner in a worn out car is probably what flashes through everyone’s mind. 🙂

Ah yes, coming to the programmers. So, you think you are safe eh? Let me ask another question. “Have you been onsite? huh? No?” Then you are a serious source of embarrassment to your parents.Your father will look at you with a smirk and your mother will have to put up with the next door lady’s narration of how her son worked “hard” and how he was finally rewarded with an onsite job.It doesn’t matter if your project is completely based in India, it doesn’t matter if there are no project requirements abroad, all that matters is – you are the dunce! 🙂

Oh yes! Once you have been onsite, you are suddenly seen in a new light! You are the toast of the family.Your success story is recited to every wannabe engineer in the family. Suddenly, you become hot in the matrimonial market!

And the story doesn’t end there. Do you have more than 10 yrs experience? And you are STILL a programmer? And not a manager?  Tch…tch *disapprovingly shakes head*. My earnest condolences. Your own wife would probably look at you in disgust. In spite of the fact that you love programming and want to “learn” more, you are not respected. You and the just-out-of-college fresher(read useless, naive, zero skills) stand equal.

So, now what is it that one should do to gain some respect you may ask? Get together with friends and start a company? (umm..lets call it Infocrib) The immediate response you are likely to get is , “Dei nee enna Narayana Murthy ah? (You think you are Narayan Murthy?”) Your only chance of getting married and settled is ruined thanks to your new found entrepreneurial skills.

Hmm…Now are you reflecting on how bad the system is and how you should give the next generation freedom to choose what they want to do? Thinking about what’s wrong if your kids become an artist, cook or a carpenter and not a software developer? Planning to not put them in coaching centers?

Good!

This new found enlightenment will fade after exactly 24 hrs.