Navaratri is almost here. If you are a South Indian, you know what that means. Golu season. Bringing out the kanjivarams that were gathering dust, taking the 9 day color-color saree challenge on Instagram and golu hopping. For the uninitiated, golu hopping is an age old tradition where the women of the house hop from one house to another, admire the dolls stacked up for display, sing a song (only Carnatic allowed and please finish the song with the pallavi only), collect their tamboola pais and don’t turn up until the next year.
Before the advent of Amazon (the website), the thrill of receiving a package of joy was during golu. Etiquette demanded that you wait until you reach home to open the bag and discover its contents (yay or meh). Given that this tradition is nearly dying, I have compiled a ready reckoner for future generations .
- Blouse bit : A square piece of clothing whose sole aspiration in life is to be converted into an actual blouse (though the probability of that happening is zero). The kind of blouse bit that you receive is a direct measure of the true feelings of the host towards you.
- Cotton blouse bit (maroon, dark green or dark blue) – We love you so we reserved the best ones for you.
- Cotton blouse bit (mustard yellow, parrot green, shocking pink) – Don’t look at me! These came in the bundle of blouse bits that I ordered from Shwetha matching center.
- Polyester blouse bit with half inch border – Lady! I barely know you and you want a Rs.100/- blouse bit? Really?
- Printed polyester blouse bit – This was a gift from last year’s golu hopping. This was never meant to be converted into an actual blouse bit. Its destiny is to hop from one owner to another until God destroys the world by sending the great flood. This will be one of the items that will go into Noah’s ark after which it will resume its journey.
- 4 inch comb (one piece) – A gift from us to the male members of your family.
- 3 cm X 3 cm pocket mirror – We thoughtfully chose one with a plastic flap on it because you know it can break from constant use.
- Two withered betel leaves : You can eat it. Maybe. At least people back in the olden times did so. What do I know!
- Areca nuts and dried turmeric (2 + 2) – This is reserved for privileged people only. Although I don’t know what you are going to do with it. You can probably add it to the areca nut stash that you have accumulated over the years from all the golu hopping. If there ever is an alien invasion, we can fool them into thinking that this is candy. And when they take a bite, their teeth will break. Alarmed, they will quietly go back to their home planet to see their dentists. Earth will be safe once again. Thanks to you – Adikke-Woman or Paaku-woman (you can choose your own costume and sidekick).
- 2-in-1 kumkum + haldi packet – Very useful in a kumkum – haldi emergency . You know when you want to use both together and you run out of them.
- Coins/Notes
- Rs. 10/- note – Pakkad mane uncle’s sister works in SBI . With great difficulty she arranged for a bundle of Rs. 10/- notes for us. Very difficult to get these days what with this sudden note banning and all. Also, do you see how influential we are?
- Rs. 5/- coin – Sorry, I can’t waste a crisp Rs. 10/- note on you.
- Rs. 1/- coin – Please be happy that you are getting free money.
- 2 green color glass bangles (secured tightly by a thin piece of string) – Disclaimer: Please don’t wear them. For display purpose only.
- Fruits
- Apple – You are the chosen one.
- Coconut – We think you are important enough to deserve one. Please think of us when you are enjoying the delicious coconut chutney.
- Moosambi – Orange’s neglected step sister. Someone gave this to me when I visited their golu. And let’s be honest, what can anyone do with one moosambi? You need at least two to make a decent cup of juice. And who eats moosambi as a fruit? Orange yes. But peeling this is just not worth the effort. So in case someone else gifts you a second one, enjoy your glass of juice.
- Two almost black elakki bananas – They were lying on the counter for a week. I was thinking of throwing it away but hey…
- Gift items:
- Stainless steel dabba/cup – Got an incredible deal at Devi Prasad Superbazaar.
- Plastic dabba / cup – Got an incredible deal from the hawker near Devi Prasad Superbazaar.
- Metal earrings – You are not married no? Why waste a dabba on you?
- Paper quill earrings – I made them by watching this jewellery making tutorial on YouTube.
- Tamboola pais aka bags
- Ikat/kalamkari tamboola pai : Eco-friendly, recyclable, fashionable, sustainable, durable, decomposable, vegetable, unbreakable tamboola pais that we bought from an Instagram influenza. Don’t forget to upload a pic of this on insta. Hashtag SustainableGolu. Also please join me on my insta live.
- Cloth bag with handle : This bag can later be used by your husband to buy your daily quota of Nandini milk packets.
- Plastic cover : You didn’t bring your own cloth bag or something? Sigh! Now I have to rummage through my big plastic bag full of small plastic bags and find one that I can live without.
The Manga Pachadi 